Monday, October 15, 2012

being a 'yes' mom.

so, this weekend the hubbs & i had the opportunity to go to the tx/ou football game at the cottonbowl. so very cool. it's one of those things i've always wanted to do but you can't quite justify spending close to $400 when it's not really your team. but we got tix and had the wonderful opportunity to go this year {even though 'our' team was all but shut out!}

we rode the dart rail there & back and on the way back we were some of the only people on the train. there was another couple & their son who was probably 10 or 11 on there with us. the son was obviously excited about whatever they had been doing that day and was super inquisitive about the train & where it was going, etc. 

the dad was NOT having it. 

it was awful. my heart broke for this child. the dad was raising his voice telling the little boy to "be quiet" and to "stop talking" and that "everyone wants to rest" and "your voice is annoying right now". i couldn't believe it. i kept having to tell the hubbs to stop glaring looking. 

the son was NOT being annoying, he was just being a little boy asking questions while on the train. now, i don't pretend to know how their day had been going up until that point. i kept trying to remind myself that it could have been an awful day with him, or that they could be going through something.... even so the mom ended up moving to the back of the car. it was... well... weird.

but it got me to thinking about how i talk to b. how i react to him. even when i have a long day. even when he's been incredibly defiant & disobedient. even... even... even. 

and i suddenly was very convicted. about my tone. about my immediate reaction. i want it to be one of encouragement, not discouragement.... or condescending. i want to be a 'yes' mom.

i want to put my phone away when they are looking. i want to give them 100% of my attention SEVERAL times a day. i'm not one to think they should get everything they want when they want it... life does not revolve around them. or me. but we're a family and they need to feel important. 

i want to be b's biggest cheerleader when he colors inside the lines or when he pretends to be a super hero. i want to speak more words of 'yes' and encouragement than those of dissent or discipline. i want to focus on all that they do good... all that they do right... not just what i need to correct.

so this week i'm going to be intention about saying yes. 

"can we go to the park?" yes.

"can we play with the play dough?" yes.

"can we build a fort?" yes.

and being positive. praising their good behavior. the traits that make them who they are - uniquely His - and focusing on what they do well. going out of my way to encourage them and love on them.

i should be doing this all the time. but life gets busy. and plans take over. and worry over discipline & training takes precedence. sometimes out of necessity, sometimes out of control and sometimes out of pure selfishness.

i have a lot on my plate this week.  but behind the hubbs, my two little ones are going to be my highest priority. making them feel special & important this week. because how can i expect them to make others feel encouraged and special if they do not feel special themselves? 

will you join me in my quest? i know it's not going to be easy & we're going to have hard days this week. but i know that He will provide the strength and tenderness that i need to love on my kids. praise Jesus.

happy monday.

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