instafriday.

a precious visual reminder that sits on my kitchen counter. it was from vacation bible school and water in africa was there "missions offering". this was such a great visual for the kids. a small bottle of water that was dirty. although i've read about the clean water project before and know that it's a very real problem, this hit home with me. all of the clean water we take for granted. to drink. to wash our hands. to bathe. to wash our clothes. to cook with. i love that b. "gets it" now.

 a picnic in the car at sonic. kiddos loved it.

game time with the bug. he loves candy land. and no, i am not the kind of parent that 'lets him win'. i'm too competetive. does that make me a bad mom? 

 a sweet treat that came just as we were sitting down for dinner. of course. 

 blackened mahi mahi. it was yumm. still not my favorite. but i guess really nothing compares to pizza. but when you're trying to eat healthy... and "whole", this will do. it was really easy, actually. i've never cooked fish before. ever. and it was a good first attempt, for sure. 

a reminder for things that are eternal. 

in an effort to eat more "whole," i've been doing a lot of baking and cooking. i did way better last week than this week. 

a homemade gift, for my precious friend, becky. she's having her second boy, but who doesn't need some new burp cloths and a new blanket? 

excited for this weekend. doing a little fourth of july celebrating. in june.

on forgiveness.

i try to keep it real in this little tiny portion of the blogosphere that i call my own, so today is one of those days that i get a bit - uh - vulnerable.

there is one thing that i'd consider my big 'life' struggle. that one thing that when i do beth moore's breaking free, it comes back to haunt me every. single. time. and i'm pretty open about my struggle. 

it's a nasty thing called bitterness. 

oh goodness, bitterness is nasty.

and it's only been a few years since i recognized what it was. when the Lord found me where i was and convicted the heck out of me. the bible talks about not letting sin take root in your heart, but man this was a deep root. and it took some time to figure out all the places it was coming from, but the main place that bitterness stemmed from in my life was unforgiveness.

not of one person in particular, or one instance. just a whole lot of harboring stuff. you know, the hurt feelings, the wrongs, the mean girls. all that. and i was always taught to just 'walk away'. and i did. for 25  years. but walking away does NOT mean to harbor. or to not forgive. i didn't get the whole "let it go" thing... and what that meant for my heart not just for my actions.

anyway. i dealt with it. and i now try very hard to recognize this unforgiveness immediately when it happens so that i can talk to the Lord about it, make anything i've done wrong right and let the Lord worry about the rest. sometimes it's a daily thing. sometimes it's a monthly thing. but it's definitely a choice. 

i remember a while ago, i met a precious friend in bible study who had been through an ugly divorce. she had been wronged in almost every way that you could imagine. i remember her telling me that she had to wake up every morning and say aloud, "i choose to forgive him, Lord." sometimes multiple times throughout the day. and for years, y'all. but she harbors NO ill feelings. like, none. i think i would be paralyzed with bitterness if i had been in that situation. but she lives a very healthy and happy life with her two beautiful daughters and a wonderful new hubby. i'm not trying, at all, to glamorize her situation, because she would be the first to tell you about all of the consequences she has had to suffer, but my point is that she has been a great example to me in forgiveness.

but i've got that thing down, now, right?

well. i got slapped in the face this week with another big realization. 

sunday, our pastor preached on forgiveness. he taught from luke 6.

"but i say to you who hear, love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you... treat others the same way you want them to treat you. if you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? for even sinners love those who love them... but love your enemies and do good, and lend, expecting nothing in return; and your reward will be great, and you will be the sons of the Most High; for He Himself is kind to ungrateful and evil men." Luke 6:27-28, 31, 35

i kept nudging the hubbs. "this message is for him!" i kept thinking to myself. he's never 'struggled' like i have with unforgiveness, but man, does he have a LOT to forgive right now during this campaign season.

but what i didn't realize was that i needed the message. that i, too, needed to forgive. even though the hatred and cursing and mistreating isn't necessarily directed toward me, it is, however, directed toward my husband. someone that i love and want to protect with all of my mama bear might. and apparently, i've been choosing to be angry about it.

it's amazing how the Lord points out stuff like that. stuff in my heart that i didn't even know was there. the ugly stuff. stuff that i don't want to admit to nor want to pay attention to. but i'm so thankful. because living with bitterness, unforgiveness and anger is no fun. and it seeps into every other part of our lives and ruins them. just like a new red shirt ruins every other shirt in that washing machine. it renders it all useless.

so. are you encouraged today? ha... sorry for my honesty this morning. i kinda just laid it all out there. no sugary post today.

but truly, be encouraged that the Lord is working all around you. in your life and in your heart. and if you have ears to hear, i promise He'll point it out to you. it ain't gonna be pretty, i can also promise that.

a verse from Jesus Calling yesterday that i loved, wrote out on a post it note and taped it to my computer:

"let me hear Your lovingkindness in the morning; for I trust in You; teach me the way in which I should walk; for to You i lift up my soul." Psalm 143:8

isn't that beautiful? lifting up my soul to Him today... He does a much better job than i could ever do.

backyard fun.

loading these pictures this morning made my heart happy.

just pure & simple joy. so innocent and free from any real worry of the world.

sure, their little 'sinful natures' are coming out in full force... but really, they know no true discontentment. they may have selfish hearts and may be a little strong willed, but they bounce back pretty quick. most of the time. i wish i could say that for myself.

sometimes i let my heart linger where it shouldn't. linger on things i don't have, or people i don't have, or places i don't have. and it proves fruitless. always. what's the point??

but our precious little ones, their hearts don't linger. yet. but they will one day. and i hope that i can teach mine how to look to the Lord to bless us... not for the world to bless us.

i pray for my kids. that they won't struggle with discontentment. or bitterness. or worry. truthfully, i don't want them to struggle with anything, but i know that's not reality. i see that b. is a people pleaser. i pray for him to be gentle & kind, but not to a fault. i see that lil' miss is a bit more independent. stubborn. but sweet when she wants to get her way. {is every girl like that?} i pray that she sees how to lean on the Lord for guidance.

but, for now, they will have fun. they will enjoy the world as they know it, and for that i'm grateful. i'm grateful for neighbors and friends who can enjoy some last minute bbq. i am thankful for a safe environment for my kids to live in and grow up. i am thankful for the freedom of religion, that we are not persecuted for living out our faith. but mostly, i'm thankful that the Lord has knocked me down build me up once again. for Him. not for me.

instafriday + a WINNER!

this week flew by, even though i felt at a slower pace, we just kept going. i haven't been feeling well for the past few weeks. a cold will come, i'll feel better and then a new cold will come. it's SUMMER time! 

i've been convicted lately about our 'diets' in our home. in fact, i've been convicted about using that word, "diet". we need to cut it out at our house and just plain eat healthy! i've been praying about what this looks like, which i'll talk more about next week after i get more of my plan together, but one of the first things i hate is WHITE FLOUR. this has been engrained in me ever since i read the south beach book years ago after i had b. so i made my own whole grain tortillas. SO easy. why haven't i done it before? and they are so so yummy! we ate these twice this week!

i love me a green monster smoothie. i had been making one with peanut butter, almond milk, some greek yogurt and banana {in addition to the spinach, of course} but it was really heavy. even though it tasted great, i could never drink more than a fourth of it. but i found a new one that i can't stop drinking. it's frozen pineapple, frozen banana, spinach, ice and water. light & refreshing!

uncle bubba & lil' miss have somewhat of a tumultous relationship. well... i guess you could say that about lil' miss & pretty much any male figure other than her daddy. she just does not like them. but sunday night we took a big step and bubba held her for a bit without her melting. {i don't think she realized it was him holding her!}

the hubbs was in a 'circus' production one year at school and i believe was the lion tamer. his mamaw made him this awesome costume. complete with a plunging neckline. love. and now that b. loves to pretend he's in the circus, he wears the costume at mimi's house. he's so cute. {and serious.}

and there you have it. instafriday, once again! have a great weekend!

*** the winner of the apron giveaway is Karen!!! Karen, email me your mailing address and I will get your apron in the mail!! Congratulations!! I too love the sunshine - but especially the dayLIGHT!!!***

on terri.

***don't forget to enter the giveaway for the little apron! i'm going to "announce" winner tomorrow! yay for a prize on friday! head on over to the post to enter!***

i have a friend.

i've talked about her before.

she's very special to me. her's is a friendship that has been long and short all at the same time. long because she dated my little brother when we were in high school. long because she thought i hated her. long because she is two years younger than i and when i graduated i pretty much never saw her again. 

like ever.

but like i said, it's short too. short because when she found out she was going to have to have a c-section with her first cutie pie she emailed me. short because she had a boy too. short because we ended up having so much in common, after all of these years. short because some weeks i talk to her every day... and sometimes we go a month without actually talking. {and i miss her when that happens.}

because she lives away. she and her husband have made a poor life choice for the family & have decided to stay outside of texas. why would she do that? why oh why oh why oh why?  {she knows i'm just giving her a hard time, but in case YOU don't know that... i'm just giving her a hard time! promise!}

so... she had some complications last summer... which broke. my. heart. but it's all in God's plan. all of it. and she ended up getting pregnant with her second child, and i couldn't have been more thrilled. i even got to hang out with her and go shopping for a bit back in february. a rare treat for me!

but. 

she's one of those people. you know the ones.

the ones that don't find out what they're having. ***gasp!*** with all of the technology out there... why on EARTH would you know use it to find out??? "but we want to be surprised!!!" give it up, girlfriend. you can be surprised the day you find out! 

anyway, moving on. so, she had a precious baby on may 1st. i was so excited for her, glued to my phone that morning waiting to find out what she had. 

and she had a precious baby girl. {i KNEW it!} it kills me that i haven't been able to cuddle her yet, but i know i'll get my hands on her soon. some day real soon, right t.?

so... i had wanted badly to make her something. but - remember i had to wait until the baby was here. and then may was kinda insane.

so it was late. like a month or two late. 

but it all worked out.

and i think it all turned out precious! and it was made with love, for her sweet gradie. {and yes, i notice the year on it.... i have already changed it and will be sending her a new one, shortly!}

she needed some pink in that 'gender neutral' baby room of hers....! my sewing isn't the best... but i'm getting better... am thinking about attempting some SHORTS! woot woot!

 

love you, sweet gradie girl! cannot wait to meet you soon!

thanks!

thanks for sharing the love of my little apron giveaway yesterday. i'm glad you all like it! i hope it makes some happy cooks out there.... maybe i should throw in a copy of my favorite cookbook too... hmmm..... :) if you haven't had a chance, go check it out! i'll pick a winner on friday.

i'm loving reading the comments about summer. i LOVE summer. don't get me wrong, when the 100 degree days of august start coming around, i'm ready for all things football and state fair, but for now, i love bare feet, athletic shorts and maxi dresses. love. it. all. 

speaking of bare feet....

we headed to the spray ground today with some friends that i don't see often enough these days.... we had a great time.